I’ve always been
fascinated by the idea of transformation. When I was a kid my favourite TV show
was Jem and the Holograms. I loved that mousy Jerrica Benton had the ability to
transform into a glamorous and adored popstar just by touching her star-shaped
earrings. You can see how the idea of escaping a mediocre life
and becoming extraordinary held such appeal to a young girl who was painfully
shy and socially awkward. Come to think of it, the Jem narrative is probably the
little girl’s equivalent of Clark Kent transforming into Superman. But with fun
music and no burden of civic responsibility. And a lot of pink, which is still
my favourite colour.
At some point in
my childhood, I realised that most people are programmed to follow the same template for who you become. Something like this: get a
job in an office, climb up the ranks, marry, have
two kids, get two cats that ignore you (I swear I’ll never understand why people bother
with cats!), move to a retirement home, forget everything, then die. The idea
that you could choose your own direction and change it at any point was foreign to me. I did
not yet understand how much power we have to shape the course of our lives, and
how restrictive the supposedly safe path we are taught to follow really is.
Christiaan is open about the fact that there were some pretty dark periods while he was in quarantine, but he says at no point in his lowest moments did he wish he had spent more time in the office or at work meetings. At the most challenging time in his life he had woken up to the fact that his career and substantial pay packet – the two things we’re all taught to chase, covet and hold dear – meant nothing. What mattered was how he had spent his 27 years on the planet so far – and that picture just wasn’t satisfying enough. When he was released from hospital he realised he could not go back to his corporate life – he had to keep living a life of creative expression. I’m paraphrasing here, but what he was saying to us was that he could no longer ignore the voice that had been begging him to live fully on his own path instead of dying partially on the conventional path.
If there is
something your soul is longing to do, why aren’t you doing that? Maybe you
yearn to write a book. Maybe you dream of fostering kids. Maybe you want to be
an alpaca farmer (that would be so great – alpacas are really cute!).
Maybe the idea of
transformation scares you. I get that. When you go in a direction that doesn’t
fit the template, you have no certainty. But here’s the thing: there are no
guarantees on the ‘safe’ path either. You could lose your job. Your spouse
could die. Your kid could end up a drug addict. You could get tuberculosis. Your
life could be thrown into turmoil at any moment. In such a volatile world,
isn’t it better to choose a path that makes you happy?
If there is a
voice in you telling you that something needs to change, maybe it’s time to listen
to it. Transformation is not easy. It creates a rupture in the fabric of your
life, and it can cause friction in your most intimate relationships. You might
fail. You might end up poor. You might lose your reputation. But there’s one
thing harder than transformation: not changing. Not changing leads to regret.
And, just like a quarantine hospital ward, regret is a miserable place to live.
You don’t have to
own a pair of pink star earrings to transform your life, you just have to
listen to your heart. You already know what you need to do.
