What I’ve noticed is
that when a message about doing something nice for themselves comes up, some
people will cite feeble excuses why they “can’t”, and generally these involve a
perceived lack of time or money. I’m sorry to sound a bit like your mum, but if
you don’t have time to look after yourself, you are doing something very wrong.
And the excuse about money doesn’t hold much currency either, because self-love
does not need to cost money. But both of these are beside the point.
What’s really going
on under the surface is that many of us don’t understand that we deserve to be
looked after – and that that it is our job to bestow that care on ourselves.
To some people, the
idea of making time for a pedicure, a yoga class or a nap on a Saturday
afternoon seems like a treat that they aren’t entitled to unless they’ve done
something special to earn it. And sometimes even when people do understand that
it is important to treat themselves, they decide they’ll do that later when
they’re not busy… you know… whenever that is...
If you take only one
thing from this post, let it be this: you do not have to change
anything to be worthy of love and care. This does not mean that you don’t
have more work to do on yourself and on your relationships (we all do) – but it also doesn’t mean you are not worthy of treats and
nourishment right this minute. You are exactly where you’re supposed to be
right now, and you’re absolutely deserving of love. It starts with you.
Making time* for a
45-minute massage may not change your life but it’s a very good place to start.
*Notice I said ‘making
time’ not ‘finding time’. No one has an abundance of time – it’s up to you to
prioritise the hours that you do have.