Are we having fun yet? If not, why not?

There is always so much to do. My OMG SO EFFING URGENT list keeps getting longer. I can barely stop to celebrate what I tick off, because there is always so much more to do. I feel like I’m treading water, exhausting myself without gaining any mileage. I am flailing in my day job, pushing hard for my fledgling side business. Little losses, tiny triumphs. Time with friends, phone calls to family fall to the bottom of my priority list. I feel like I am failing everyone, including myself. I am always tired, and there’s always so much more to do.

I have a feeling many of you are nodding in recognition as you read this.

Since starting my business and this blog more than a year ago, I feel like I’m on a treadmill. I wrote recently about how hard it was to stop and relax during my summer break – and I’m facing a similar struggle. 

At the start of 2016 I had a friend do an angel reading for me, and one of the messages that came through was my need to have more fun and be more social. I rolled my eyes. Who has time for fun, for God’s sake?! There’s always so much to do. But because the angels are always right, I took the advice on board and implemented a fun project – a once-a-month commitment to do one fun activity I’ve never done before or go to a new place. I tried this last year then abandoned it after a few months because it didn’t seem like a priority. Yes, I know how lame that sounds. I mean, I was SCHEDULING fun – then failing to meet that commitment. I know that fun and play do not happen spontaneously for me. If I do not create time for fun, my weekends and evenings will continue to be swallowed up by work and life admin. Because, as mentioned, there is always so much to do.

Last Tuesday was Australia Day – a public holiday. I planned to spend the day generating story ideas and blog posts, maybe sorting out my tax records to get on top of my present state of chaos. (Whoa, how exciting am I?! No wonder men are lining up to date me!) But I woke up and I knew I had to get out of the house, and out of my routine. I knew I needed fresh air and a change of scene to get my creative juices flowing. So, I gave myself the day off. 

It felt weird.

I went on a 10km walk along a beautiful stretch of coastline, weaving in and out of national parks and dipping into golden beaches. I remembered how lucky I am to live in The Lucky Country. I climbed cliffs and took in scenery that took my breath away. I reflected on how much is right in my life, and how far I’ve come. I did not, and would not, let myself feel guilty about all the tasks that were still on my stupid list. Then I went to a friend’s pool party and caught up with some of my favourite people. I went to sleep feeling rejuvenated and passionate about who I am, where I am and what I am doing. The angels were right, as per.

So, I have a very important question for you: are you having enough fun? 

Fun is not a luxury. It is not a treat or something you have to earn. It is as important to your life as exercise, good food, fresh air and good people. As the saying goes: nobody gets to the end of their life and wishes they’d spent more time in the boardroom. I know your deadlines and projects seem uber important right now, but you won’t remember them in 10 years’ time. You will remember the laughter, the sunshine and the feels. These are the ingredients of your life. Are you using them to create something that’s a worthy tribute to your own awesomnity? If not, why not? 

I’m saying this to you, but of course, I’m really saying it to myself. 

Just press play

This week I spent $AUD83 ($US64) on two giant inflatable pigs. This is not a sentence I expected to be writing, to be honest. I can’t quite explain what came over me. I saw the pigs, I imagined how much fun it would be to play with them, and I hit ‘buy’. And I regret nothing.

I believe my inner child might be responsible for this uncharacteristic act of silliness, for I am not what you’d describe as a spontaneous, irresponsible shopper. But lately, following instructions from the angels, I’ve been listening to my inner child and it’s made me take life a lot less seriously – which is pretty welcome.

The idea of the inner child is difficult for a thirtysomething to comprehend. Play is for little kids, right? But the more I read about inner child work, the more intrigued I am.

It’s said that we have three parts to our identities. For women: the maiden (inner child), mother (nurturer) and matriarch (the teacher). For men: the lad, the dad and the patriarch. Most of us abandon our inner child as we grow up, thinking it has no place in the adult world. Yet making time to be silly and light-hearted is very important for a balanced sense of wellbeing. This doesn’t mean starting a food fight at the family lunch or telling fart jokes (though I’m all for a bit of immature humour) but it does mean making room to be carefree. It changes your perspective, and that’s when your creativity really starts to flow. 

Some ways I’ve been nurturing my inner child include:

*  Colouring in. You guys, this is so, so fun. I bought a book called Colouring In For Grown-ups and I highly recommend it. This activity is incredibly therapeutic. I’m not the only one getting down with colouring in – in France, colouring books for adults are now outselling cookbooks. Seriously!

*  Swinging. No, not that kind of swinging – get your mind out of the gutter! I mean playing on swings at the local playground. Just be careful of any little kids, who tend to wander out in front of you (which may end badly).

 * Dancing. Try not to laugh, but I’ve started a ritual of coming home from work and blasting Taylor Swift’s Shake It Off and dancing like no one is watching (and no one is). You can actually feel your problems fall off the end of your fingertips. My spirits are so high that I often end up playing a few more songs before I have to stop and catch my breath. This is how I remember what it means to feel alive.

* Watching Disney movies. These are always so beautifully done, and often include some simple but powerful messages about life. Preach, Disney!